Incoherence

Here we go. I’m needing a place to store all of my favorite things to say on people’s Facebook walls or comments. These are in no particular order of quality or fun. The only explanation for why I can’t stop posting the following on people’s walls is that I’ve had a recent fascination with incoherence in general.

-WARN THE POLICE

-OH NO

-NOT AGAIN

-pun intended

-Thou shalt NOT… .

-SPARE ME

-At last.

-FINALLY.
-COUNT ME IN!
-IT'S NOT REALLY HER!!!

(Keep your eyes open for more)

Your job is to find the right context for this stuff. It's surprising how entertaining it is to post these kinds of responses on the Facebook.com. If you really want to have some fun, drop the nouns out of your sentences with no pause when speaking to others.

Ex: Oh man! Did you see the way they looked after we jumped over the (missing noun) though? I mean it wasn't like we asked where the (missing noun) was, but they could have been a little nicer at least!

Go ahead and read that example out loud. You can even memorize it and say it to someone. They might even respond as if you've said a real sentence. Just, please, leave out the noun.

Look what I made over break! 

Apparently they were all making faces like mine, so I made their faces like mine.

Sincerely,

Jared

Spoiler Alert, Bro.

No- don't worry, there won't be any spoilers in this comment. Actually- I won't make you any promises, in fact I think there may be a spoiler.

Apparently a few weeks ago I gave away, what to my good friend Kyle, was a key piece of information to something that he hadn't yet seen or heard. I spoiled it for him. He was upset because I hadn't given him a spoiler alert. In fact, I think his exact words were, "Spoiler alert bro?! Where was the spoiler alert?"

Me typing this just made me realize something aside from the fact that I want to find opportunities to say "Spoiler alert" and "Spoiler alert bro". What I just realized is that I've been using the word "bro" in a lot of Facebook commenting lately.

"Bro" has apparently entered into my vocabulary. If saying the word makes me any more like a Bro than I already am, then I'll just believe that it makes me more well rounded, and probably more well toned. The truth is, I'm really just upset that I missed Brovember.

I had a missed opportunity to say spoiler alert the other day. Another dear friend, Ben, gave away something that to him was an unimportant and irrelevant detail for the film "Tron: Legacy", newly released in theaters. My heart tightened as he casually spit out the minute detail. I think I even made some sort of noise hoping he wouldn't say anymore. He must have heard me, because the subject changed. Where was the spoiler alert, Ben?


Tron wasn't bad. I enjoy being cheaply entertained sometimes. I got what I expected.

I'm on the fence right now on the issue of getting a minor in either Political Science or Visual Arts. Really- by visual arts I mean graphic design. I'm too tired to explain the details, but the whole issue is that both can benefit me in future job opportunities and enjoyment. I just can't tell which would benefit me more as a minor. 

I'm leaning towards graphic design, and I might fall off the fence to that side quickly if nobody intervenes. If you have an opinion, let it be known! I'll take any spoiler on my future if you think it would do me good.

Here's the album art for a "double" that Thomas Huerta and I made. We decided to call it a double considering it only has two songs.

Goodnight, bro.

Additions to myself: "Spoiler alert", "Bro", A Poem